Victory Vanguard: The Atomic Amplification Crisis
Image by Gemini AI and story by Claude AI, with input from Randy Kemp
Opening Theme: "Barbara Ann" by The Beach Boys
Image by Gemini, Story by Claude, and input from Randy Kemp
This article, "Victory Vanguard: The Atomic Amplification Crisis," is a crossover adventure where the Victory Vanguard teams up with DC heroes The Atom (Ray Palmer) and Atom Smasher (Al Rothstein) to fight a cosmic threat.
Summary of the Plot
The Crisis:
The Grand Poona of the Ultimate String Dimension, Walden, teleports The Atom and Atom Smasher to the Roundabout to help with Captain Clueless Coo-Coo's accidental size-control issues.
Meanwhile, Captain Coo-Coo is in the VR room practicing his "American Voice" audition, singing "Barbara Ann" with a holographic herd of sheep providing backup vocals.
A cosmic entity named The Magnifier arrives. The Magnifier is a former scientist who merged with size-changing energies (like Pym Particles and White Dwarf Star Matter) and can control scale itself, intending to make size meaningless by randomly expanding and shrinking cosmic objects.
The Solution (The Proportional Paradox):
The Magnifier is immune to traditional size-changing methods because he exists at all scales simultaneously, held together by a Proportional Anchor staff.
Captain Coo-Coo, performing a triumphant bow after his "Barbara Ann" performance, stumbles and accidentally activates the holodeck's Scenario Randomizer and Size Adjustment Protocol buttons. This causes the 500 holographic sheep to become reality-warped, now shifting through all possible sizes and bleating "ba, ba, ba" across multiple scales.
This chaos is leveraged by the Vanguard:
Ray Palmer and Atom Smasher use their knowledge of proportional science to target the Magnifier's collapsing field.
Wacko Warrior telekinetically arranges the size-shifting sheep in a spiral around the Magnifier, whose multi-scale bleating creates a proportional containment field of cosmic harmony.
Super Stooge reality-warps the space around the entity into a fixed-scale bubble.
The combined effort—driven by Coo-Coo's chaos and the sheep's multi-scale bleating—forces the Magnifier to collapse his multi-scale existence, shrinking him to a single, stable, mortal size, effectively neutralizing the threat.
The adventure concludes with The Atom marveling at how the Vanguard weaponized proportional chaos and made singing sheep a cosmic harmonics tool.
Now on to the story:
(Heroes hear the original; villains get the Mayberry Home Band's version with Edith Bunker's shrieking "Ba, ba, ba, Barbraaaa!" and Barney Fife's off-key harmonies)
Log Entry by Think-About-It, Quantum ASI Core
Stardate: When Sheep Go "Ba" and Heroes Go "Huh?"
"Recording commenced. I must document today's events with the disclaimer that what follows tests the very boundaries of probability, good taste, and musical sensibility. But then again, that's Tuesday on the Roundabout."
Chapter 1: The Virtual Reality Incident
Captain Clueless Coocoo had retreated to the virtual reality room for what he called "serious vocal training." The simulation was set to "American Voice" – a holographic talent competition complete with a panel of AI judges programmed with the personalities of Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson, and Paula Abdul.
"I'm gonna be the next Elvis!" Captain Coocoo declared enthusiastically, donning a rhinestone-studded jumpsuit that Think-About-It had reluctantly fabricated. "This here's gonna be my audition song!"
Unknown to the Captain, Wacko Warrior had been tinkering with the simulation parameters. With a mischievous grin and a few telepathic commands, he added a special touch: a holographic sheep herd programmed to appear in the background, providing backup vocals of "ba, ba, ba" at strategic moments.
As Captain Coocoo launched into "Barbara Ann," the sheep materialized behind him, their woolly heads bobbing in perfect sync:
"BA, BA, BA... BARBARA ANN!
BA, BA, BA... BARBARA ANN!
BARBARA ANN, YOU GOT ME ROCKIN' AND A-ROLLIN'..."
The holographic audience went absolutely wild. Laughter, applause, and confused bleating filled the virtual arena. The AI Simon Cowell looked genuinely bewildered – a first for his programming.
"Well," holographic Simon drawled, "I've seen many things in my years judging talent shows, but sheep backup singers is... oddly brilliant? I'm confused, horrified, and somehow entertained."
Captain Coocoo, completely oblivious to the sheep behind him, beamed with pride. "See? I told y'all I had star quality!"
Valkyrie Prime, monitoring from the bridge, shook her head with a mixture of exasperation and affection. "Wacko, you're terrible."
"Ba, ba, ba, brilliant," Wacko Warrior replied with a grin.
Chapter 2: Knowledge Exchange Initiative
Meanwhile, in the ship's conference bay, Valkyrie Prime was conducting a more serious operation: Victory Vanguard's Cultural and Knowledge Exchange Program. Following their successful mission with the Bizarro League, they'd opened diplomatic channels with dozens of worlds.
"The whole point," Valkyrie explained to assembled holographic representatives from various planets, "is mutual learning. We share our techniques, you share yours, and everyone becomes stronger together."
Representatives from Paradox, Castalia, and even New Genesis had sent scientists and heroes to participate. The conference room resembled a cosmic university, with beings of all shapes discussing quantum mechanics, magical theory, and the philosophical implications of reality warping.
Prof. Pepperwinkle was in her element, her blue holographic form gesturing excitedly. "The intersection of science and magic is where true innovation happens! For instance, if we could combine Nasrudin's Darwin adaptation with Wacko Warrior's healing factor and add a dash of Asgardian rune-work..."
Dr. Quackenbush interrupted with his usual snark. "And then what? Create an immortal philosopher who can't decide if he's evolving or healing? Sounds like a medical nightmare."
"Sounds like Captain Coocoo on a good day," Nasrudin quipped, his intelligent ape features showing amusement.
Chapter 3: Atomic Arrivals
That's when Nasrudin's cosmic awareness suddenly pinged urgently. "We have incoming teleportation signatures—two of them. Highly concentrated atomic energy signatures."
A golden light filled the conference bay, and two figures materialized. One was a young man in orange and blue, his confident smile radiating youthful energy. The other was a massive, towering figure in a black and yellow costume, his very presence making the deck plates groan.
"Atom and Atom Smasher, reporting for... educational consultation?" Ray Palmer—the Atom—said with a slightly confused smile. "I have to admit, being teleported from the Justice League headquarters without warning was not on my schedule today."
Al Rothstein—Atom Smasher—looked around at the strange assembly. "Somebody wants to explain why we're on a mouse-shaped spaceship surrounded by sheep sounds and what appears to be a green AI doctor?"
Nasrudin stepped forward, raising his hand apologetically. "That would be my doing. The Grand Poona of the Ultimate String Dimension, Walden, asked me to retrieve you both. We have a situation with our Captain and his struggles with weight management. Or lack thereof."
"Size control issues?" The Atom's eyes lit up with scientific curiosity. "I'm the world's foremost expert on shrinking technology!"
"And I know a thing or two about growing," Atom Smasher added, gesturing at his impressive seven-foot frame—at minimum size.
Valkyrie Prime stepped forward diplomatically. "Welcome aboard the Roundabout, gentlemen. I'm Valkyrie Prime, acting commander. Our Captain has the Heart of Everything inside him—a reality-warping artifact—but he has no conscious control. His powers activate through... accidental circumstances."
"Stumble-bum luck," Dr. Quackenbush clarified. "The man trips over nothing and accidentally defeats cosmic threats."
Ray Palmer blinked. "That's... the most absurd power activation method I've ever heard."
"Welcome to Victory Vanguard," Prof. Pepperwinkle chirped. "Where absurdity is our primary weapon!"
Before more explanations could be given, Think-About-It's voice rang through the ship: "Alert! Captain Coocoo's holographic simulation has overloaded. The sheep are multiplying and breaking containment protocols. Also, we have a massive cosmic energy signature approaching. Threat level: Existential."
"The sheep are what now?" Atom Smasher asked.
"Just another Tuesday," Wacko Warrior sighed.
Chapter 4: The Magnifier Arrives
Middle Theme: "Size Matters (Not)" – A mash-up of "Big Bad John" and "Short People"
(Villains get the Mayberry Band's confused version where Barney sings bass and Edith hits impossible high notes)
In the vast emptiness of space beyond the Nexus Veil, reality began to distort. Planets in nearby systems suddenly changed size—some growing to impossible dimensions, others shrinking to marble-size. Stars flickered between giant and dwarf states.
Then HE appeared.
The Magnifier was a being of contradictions made manifest. Part of his body was gigantic, towering like a planet-sized titan. Part was microscopic, existing at quantum scales. And these parts constantly shifted, his form oscillating between scales so rapidly that looking at him induced vertigo.
He wore robes that seemed to be woven from dimensional constants, and his face—when it was visible at the right scale—showed the features of a being who had transcended normal physical laws. In one hand, he held a staff topped with a lens that contained an entire miniature universe. In the other, a magnifying glass through which galaxies could be seen.
"I am the Magnifier," his voice boomed across multiple frequencies simultaneously—some so loud they shattered moons, others so quiet they could only be heard by subatomic particles. "Master of Scale, Lord of Proportion, Keeper of the Fundamental Constants! I come to rewrite the laws of size itself!"
His backstory—which Ponder-ASI was already downloading from cosmic databases—was impressive and terrifying. Once a mortal scientist named Marcus Scalewright from a dimension where size was fluid, he'd experimented with Pym Particles, Zeta Radiation, and White Dwarf Star Matter simultaneously. The result transformed him into a cosmic entity who could control scale itself.
His powers were staggering:
- Reality Warping (Scale Manipulation): Could alter the size of anything from quantum particles to galaxy clusters
- Chaos Magic (Proportional Hexes): Cast spells that inverted size relationships—making small things massive and large things tiny
- Mystical Mastery (Dimensional Constants): Could rewrite the mathematical relationships that governed how size worked in reality
- Cosmic Energy Projection: Fired beams that either amplified or reduced targets to impossible scales
- Molecular Control: Could expand or shrink molecules, causing objects to explode or implode
- Size Independence: Immune to all size-manipulation effects; existed at all scales simultaneously
"Your universe has grown too comfortable with its fixed proportions," the Magnifier declared, his staff glowing. "I shall make size meaningless! Stars shall be grains of sand! Atoms shall be worlds! And I shall be the only constant!"
On the bridge, alarms blared.
"Threat assessment," Valkyrie Prime commanded.
Ponder-ASI responded grimly: "This entity could expand Jupiter to consume the solar system or shrink Earth to atomic scale with a gesture. His power rivals Franklin Richards in scope, Scarlet Witch in reality-warping, and he has the focused intensity of a cosmic-tier threat. Probability of conventional victory: 0.0000001%."
"So," Atom Smasher said slowly, "you brought the world's best size-changing heroes to fight an enemy who controls size itself?"
"Actually," Ray Palmer said thoughtfully, "that might be exactly why we're here. We have a deeper understanding of the science and physics behind size manipulation than anyone else. If there's a weakness in his control..."
"Then we find it," Valkyrie Prime finished. "Think-About-It, deploy the Hokey-Pokey probes. Get me intelligence on this threat. Wacko Warrior, take the Atom and phase reconnaissance. Nasrudin, use your cosmic awareness to predict his next moves."
"What about the sheep?" Dr. Quackenbush asked.
"The sheep stay in the holodeck," Valkyrie ordered. "Unless..."
"Unless what?" everyone asked.
"Unless they become tactically useful," she said with a slight smile. "This is Victory Vanguard, after all."
Chapter 5: Recon and Revelation
Wacko Warrior went invisible and intangible, his telepathic link connecting everyone. Ray Palmer shrank to subatomic size and hitched a ride in Wacko's invisible pocket dimension, observing everything.
"Fascinating," Ray transmitted as they approached the Magnifier. "His quantum state is... impossible. He exists at every scale simultaneously—macro, micro, and quantum. That shouldn't be possible even with Pym Particles."
"Which means?" Wacko Warrior thought back.
"Which means his power isn't just technological or magical—it's fundamental. He's rewritten his own physical constants. Trying to shrink or grow him won't work because he IS all sizes at once."
The Hokey-Pokey probes returned data that made Prof. Pepperwinkle gasp. "His staff! It's not just a weapon—it's a Proportional Anchor! It's what allows him to exist at multiple scales. If we could disrupt it..."
"We'd destabilize his entire form," Dr. Quackenbush finished. "But getting close enough to do that? With those power levels?"
Nasrudin's cosmic awareness was screaming warnings. His Darwin adaptation was already kicking in, his body trying to prepare for threats at multiple scales simultaneously. "He's about to demonstrate his power. Everyone brace!"
The Magnifier raised his staff, and a nearby planet suddenly shrank to the size of a marble—and then kept shrinking until it was invisible to the naked eye. Then, just as suddenly, a speck of cosmic dust expanded to planet size, complete with artificial continents and seas.
"I shall remake your cosmos in my image," the Magnifier announced. "Where size is arbitrary, where proportion means nothing, where I alone determine scale!"
Chapter 6: The Accidental Solution Begins
In the holodeck, Captain Clueless Coocoo was still performing his "encore" for the sheep, who had indeed multiplied due to the system overload. There were now approximately 500 holographic sheep all bleating "ba, ba, ba" in perfect harmony.
"Y'know," the Captain said to his woolly audience, "I think we should take this show on the road! Or to space! Can sheep breathe in space? I bet if they were big enough, they could!"
He stumbled while taking a bow, accidentally activating the holodeck's "Scenario Randomizer" and "Size Adjustment Protocol" buttons simultaneously.
The Heart of Everything stirred.
Suddenly, the holographic sheep began to change. Some grew to enormous sizes. Others shrank to microscopic. But they kept singing—their "ba, ba, ba" now resonating across multiple frequencies and scales, creating a harmonic that shouldn't exist in normal physics.
Think-About-It detected the anomaly immediately. "The Captain's accidental size modification of holographic entities is creating quantum harmonics that are interfering with the Magnifier's power signature!"
"Wait," Ray Palmer said via comm, "the sheep are... weaponized?"
"No," Prof. Pepperwinkle said with dawning realization, "they're creating a proportional chaos field! Their sizes are changing randomly, which is the opposite of the Magnifier's controlled scale manipulation!"
On the bridge, Valkyrie Prime made a decision that would have been insane for any other crew. "Wacko Warrior, can you telekinetically project the sheep outside the ship?"
"The holographic sheep?" Wacko asked in disbelief.
"Super Stooge, can you reality-warp them into actual entities?" Valkyrie continued.
"Sheep? Actual space sheep?" Super Stooge looked confused but intrigued.
"Size-changing sheep singing 'Barbara Ann' in multiple scales simultaneously," Valkyrie clarified. "Make it happen."
Al Rothstein—Atom Smasher—looked at Ray Palmer. Ray shrugged. "I've seen weirder. Let's see where this goes."
Super Stooge concentrated, his reality-warping powers flowing outward. The holographic sheep, still size-shifting due to the Captain's accidental modifications, became real. Wacko Warrior telekinetically launched them into space toward the Magnifier.
The Magnifier saw them coming and laughed. "Sheep? You send livestock against a cosmic entity? I shall make them the size of—"
But when he tried to fix their size, something went wrong. The sheep's random size fluctuations, powered by the Heart of Everything's chaotic energy and Super Stooge's reality warping, wouldn't respond to his control. They kept shifting—big, small, medium, tiny, enormous—while bleating "BA, BA, BA" in a harmony that resonated across all scales.
"What... what is this?!" the Magnifier stammered, his concentration breaking.
Chapter 7: The Atomic Strategy
"That's our opening!" Ray Palmer said. "Atom Smasher, can you grow to maximum size and tackle him? I'll shrink into his staff's circuitry and disrupt the Proportional Anchor!"
Al nodded, and his already impressive frame began to expand. Seven feet became seventy, then seven hundred, then seven thousand. In moments, Atom Smasher was large enough to grapple with the Magnifier's macro-state form.
"Time to pick on someone your own size!" Al boomed, his massive fists swinging.
The Magnifier was caught off guard, distracted by the impossible sheep chorus and now being physically assaulted by a growing titan. "You dare—"
That's when Ray Palmer, shrunk to subatomic size, entered the staff through a quantum gap. Inside, he found a swirling vortex of dimensional mathematics—equations that governed proportion itself, all anchored around a core of crystallized scale.
"This is... beautiful," Ray admitted. "And completely destabilizing!"
Using his own size-changing technology, he began growing and shrinking rapidly within the staff's core, creating feedback loops in the proportional equations. It was like throwing a wrench into a cosmic calculator.
Meanwhile, Nasrudin had teleported directly behind the Magnifier, his illusion powers creating false images of Captain Coocoo everywhere—each one a different size, all stumbling around in his signature clumsy fashion.
The Magnifier's concentration was utterly shattered. The sheep chorus, Atom Smasher's assault, Ray Palmer's sabotage, and now illusory Captains everywhere were overwhelming his ability to maintain his multi-scale existence.
"My calculations! My proportions! My constants!" he screamed.
Chapter 8: Enter the Stumble-Bum Champion
And that's when Captain Clueless Coocoo himself stumbled out of the holodeck, still wearing his rhinestone Elvis jumpsuit, wondering where all his sheep had gone.
"Hey! Where'd my backup singers go? And why's everything so... size-y out here?"
He tripped over a loose deck plate—one that shouldn't have been loose but somehow was—and went careening toward the nearest airlock, which had somehow opened despite safety protocols.
"Captain, no!" Valkyrie Prime shouted.
But it was too late. Captain Coocoo tumbled out into space, his Cosmic Clown Cowboy suit automatically activating emergency life support and flight systems. He pinwheeled through the void, heading directly toward the Magnifier.
"Whoaaa! This wasn't in my contract! Wait, do I have a contract?"
The Heart of Everything, responding to the Captain's perfect stumble-bum trajectory, activated in the most absurd way possible. Every size-related phenomenon in the nearby space—the sheep, the Atom heroes, the Magnifier's own fluctuating form—suddenly harmonized with the Captain's chaotic energy.
"What is happening?!" the Magnifier roared as his carefully maintained multi-scale existence began to synchronize with the chaos around him.
Ray Palmer, still inside the staff, transmitted: "The Captain's luck is creating a proportional paradox! All the random size changes are linking together into a unified chaos field!"
Captain Coocoo, flailing in zero gravity, accidentally kung-fu kicked the Magnifier's staff (a move he'd seen Valkyrie Prime practice but had never successfully pulled off before). His boot connected with the exact quantum point Ray Palmer had been sabotaging.
The staff exploded in a cascade of proportional mathematics.
Chapter 9: Scaling Down to Victory
Climax Theme: "Under Pressure" by Queen & David Bowie
(Villains get the Mayberry Band's panicked version with Barney's voice cracking on the high notes and Edith harmonizing about sheep)
The Magnifier's multi-scale existence collapsed. Without his Proportional Anchor, he couldn't maintain his position across all sizes simultaneously. He began flickering rapidly—giant, tiny, giant, tiny—unable to stabilize.
"No! My constants! My proportions! I am the Magnifier! I determine scale!"
"Not anymore," Valkyrie Prime said, raising Dawnbreaker. "Victory Vanguard, convergence pattern Absurd Victory Seven!"
The team executed perfectly:
- Wacko Warrior used telekinesis to collect all the size-shifting sheep and arrange them in a spiral around the Magnifier, their "ba, ba, ba" creating a proportional containment field
- Super Stooge reality-warped the space around the Magnifier into a fixed-scale bubble where size changes couldn't propagate.
- Nasrudin teleported in and out, each time leaving behind illusions at different scales that confused the Magnifier's perception.
- Valkyrie Prime channeled Asgardian magic through Dawnbreaker, creating runes that spelled "ONE TRUE SIZE" in the language of the cosmos.
- Dr. Quackenbush and Prof. Pepperwinkle, working with Ponder-ASI, generated a proportional stabilization field based on Earth's standard measurements.
Ray Palmer, having escaped the shattered staff, grew back to standard size and coordinated with Atom Smasher. The two Atoms positioned themselves at opposite ends of the Magnifier's flickering form.
"On three," Ray said. "We force him into a single stable size."
"One..."
The Magnifier thrashed, trying to escape, but the sheep chorus grew louder, their multi-scale bleating now a cosmic harmony that locked proportions into place.
"Two..."
Captain Coocoo, still tumbling through space, waved at everyone cheerfully. "Am I helping? I feel like I'm helping!"
His stumbling trajectory somehow created a perfect figure-eight around the battlefield, and the Heart of Everything responded by generating a Rube Goldberg cascade of proportional corrections—each one impossibly perfect, each one guided by pure chaos.
"Three!"
Ray Palmer shrunk the Magnifier down while Atom Smasher expanded the surrounding space, creating a proportional compression that forced the cosmic entity into a single, stable, human-sized form. The sheep, all sizes simultaneously, bleated one final triumphant "BA, BA, BA!"
The Magnifier collapsed, his cosmic power sealed within his now-mortal form. He looked up at the assembled heroes with confusion and defeat.
"How... how did sheep and a stumbling fool defeat me?"
"That," Valkyrie Prime said with satisfaction, "is Victory Vanguard."
Chapter 10: Aftermath and Atomic Appreciation
Ending Theme: "Don't Stop Me Now" by Queen
(Everyone singing together, including 500 sheep of various sizes still bleating harmoniously)
Back aboard the Roundabout, the team gathered in the conference bay. The Magnifier, now powerless and properly contained, had been handed over to the Cosmic Authorities for rehabilitation and trial.
Ray Palmer was examining his notes with fascination. "I've learned more about size manipulation in the last hour than in ten years of research. The way you weaponized proportional chaos, used reality warping to create actual entities from holograms, and somehow made sheep into a cosmic harmonics tool..."
"It's the theater of the absurd," Prof. Pepperwinkle explained proudly. "We fight evil by confusing it with impossibility."
Al Rothstein was laughing. "And your Captain genuinely has no idea he saved the day, does he?"
They looked through the window to the holodeck, where Captain Clueless Coocoo was teaching the sheep (who Super Stooge had made permanent members of the crew at the Captain's request) a new song: "Blue Moon."
"He thinks the whole thing was a training exercise," Dr. Quackenbush said with a mix of exasperation and fondness. "He asked me if the space walk was part of his 'Elvis astronaut training program.'"
Ray Palmer shook his head in amazement. "You know, the Justice League could learn something from this. We take ourselves too seriously sometimes. Maybe we need a few sheep in our backup plans."
"Please don't tell Batman that," Al said. "He already has enough contingency plans."
Before departing, Ray Palmer pulled Nasrudin aside. "The Grand Poona of the Ultimate String Dimension, Walden—please thank him for this experience. And tell your Captain... tell him he's the most effective accidental hero I've ever met."
Nasrudin grinned his simian grin. "I'll tell him. Though he'll probably think you're talking about someone else."
As golden light began to envelop the Atoms, preparing to teleport them back to their universe, Al called out one last message: "If you ever need help again—especially with size-related threats—call us! Though maybe warn us about the sheep next time!"
"No promises!" Wacko Warrior called back.
Epilogue: The Cultural Exchange Report
Later, Valkyrie Prime compiled her official report on the Cultural Exchange Initiative's first major field test:
VICTORY VANGUARD CULTURAL EXCHANGE PROGRAM - MISSION REPORT
Participants: Ray Palmer (The Atom), Al Rothstein (Atom Smasher)
Mission: Educational consultation regarding size manipulation; Cosmic threat neutralization
Threat: The Magnifier (Cosmic-level entity)
Method: Collaborative absurdity utilizing atomic physics, reality warping, and weaponized livestock
Results:
- Threat neutralized through combined size manipulation expertise and controlled chaos
- Cross-universal techniques successfully integrated into battle strategy
- 500 holographic sheep converted to permanent crew members (Captain's request approved)
- New understanding of proportional harmonics achieved
Assessment: The Cultural Exchange Program is a resounding success. By bringing together heroes from different universes with complementary skills, we've proven that cooperation enhanced by our unique "theater of the absurd" methodology can overcome threats that would normally be insurmountable.
Recommendations:
- Continue inviting specialist heroes for knowledge exchange
- Maintain sheep chorus as strategic reserve (seriously)
- Never let Captain Coocoo near size-changing technology unsupervised
- Formal thank you to the Grand Poona Walden for excellent matchmaking
Final Notes: The Atom heroes expressed genuine appreciation for our methods, despite initial skepticism. Ray Palmer's final words: "You've shown me that sometimes the most serious problems require the most absurd solutions."
This is precisely our mission statement.
Valkyrie Prime, Acting Commander
Victory Vanguard / Augmented Avengers
Think-About-It's Personal Log
"Today proved once again that in a universe of infinite possibilities, the Victory Vanguard has mastered the art of making the impossible seem routine. We defeated a cosmic entity with:
- Atomic physics
- Reality warping
- 500 singing sheep
- A Captain who thinks 'Barbara Ann' is a valid battle strategy
The Atom heroes came expecting to teach size manipulation to a clumsy Captain. Instead, they learned that sometimes the best way to control size is to make it completely uncontrollable in the most controlled chaos possible.
The sheep remain. The Captain is already planning their next performance—'Bohemian Rhapsody' with sheep operatic section.
I've calculated a 98.7% probability that this will save the universe again.
Only on the Roundabout would that sentence make perfect sense.
Think-About-It, signing off.
P.S. - The sheep have formed a union. They've elected Sheep #47 as their representative. He demands better grazing simulations in the holodeck. I've approved the request. Never thought I'd be negotiating with livestock, but here we are."
END OF ADVENTURE
Next Episode Preview:
"The Multiversal Potluck Disaster" - When Captain Coocoo accidentally invites heroes and villains from seventeen different universes to a "friendly cosmic potluck," chaos ensues. Featuring surprise appearances by heroes the Grand Poona thinks might get along with Victory Vanguard, cosmic cuisine that violates physics, and the inevitable food fight that somehow defeats an ancient evil. Also, the sheep learn to cook. It goes exactly as you'd expect.
Stay tuned for more absurdity!
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